Poster <Carnival Party of the Schubertbund/ The World must be improved> （Plakat <Fastnachtsfest des Schubertbundes / Die Welt muss verbessert werden>）

世界大戦ポスター　　戦争がしたければ海軍兵にお成りなさゐ

[THE EATERS OF HORSEFLESH 10]: 1st SCHOLAR: － I'm beginning to be tired of horse-meat... they haven't yet thought of eating dog... what if we try it?... 2nd SCHOLAR: － Why, well!... it's an idea, but let's talk more quietly so he has no suspicions

The Blue-stockings 17: (The pit at the Odéon) － The author!... the author!... the author!... － Gentlemen, your impatience will be satisfied... you wish to know who is the author of this play which has just received such a great, and I should say, such justifiable, success... the author... is meeeeee!

BOHEMIANS OF PARIS 22: THE CLOTHES SELLER: “Closes to sell!... any hats, shoes, old clothes to sell!” This trade fourishes at carnival time in the vicinity of the schools of law and medicine: the student willingly sells his wardrobe to get himself a stevedore's costume, a wife, a small thimble-full of champagne and limitless tittle-tattle!

PARISIANS TYPES 30: －My God! Missus Bombec, what hit you? －Don't mention it,dear lady, the horror! the world's become so ferocious that I'd rather be the gatekeeper at the zoo. You know that Bezuchet on the fifth floor who tells everyone that her not-so great daughter, whose filling out nicely round the waist, has become Whatdropical. Me, I just said: oh yeh! －And that's the creature that... －by Jove, flew into my face

JOURNEY TO CHINA 9: A CHINESE DANCE.One is greatly mistaken if one believes the Chinese people to be giddy, joyful and the friend of pleasure: they are on the contrary serious and morose, since their greatest amusement consists in a type of lugubrious walking in which the men and women walk one in front of the other, or one beside the other, and seem to be saying among themselves: brother we should die! In order also to point to the philosophical intention behind this ceremony, the opposite of dancing, they call it: Counter-dancing

MONOMANIACS 5: THE REGULATOR: The word regulator normally applying to a type of machine, may wall also be applied to the individual above. One finds in Paris, said to be the most spiritual town in the most spiritual country in the Universe, several dozen particular men whose sole intellectual occupation is to regulate, each day, their watch on the shot of midday from the canon of the Royal Palace. Here, gunpowder makes those happy who will never set the world on fire

MONOMANIACS 5: THE REGULATOR: The word regulator normally applying to a type of machine, may wall also be applied to the individual above. One finds in Paris, said to be the most spiritual town in the most spiritual country in the Universe, several dozen particular men whose sole intellectual occupation is to regulate, each day, their watch on the shot of midday from the canon of the Royal Palace. Here, gunpowder makes those happy who will never set the world on fire

BOHEMIANS OF PARIS 15: THE OLD ROUÉE: So I'm going to be a door-keeper in the rue du Mont-Blanc in a large house where my husband says they'll call us porters. So I'm going to leave this ramshackle place where there're only four tenants who give me five sous apiece for a New Year's present... Scum!!!..

NEWS 194: To a known air: －Oh! Richard, oh! my king, the universe abandons you, On the earth there is thus only you interested in your person

TODAY'S PHILANTHROPISTS 12: －So then, my friend, at the age of twenty two you had already killed three men... what a powerful nature, and how guilty society is for not having better guided it!... －Oh! yeah sir!... in my view the police have been very wrong... without them I wouldn't be here!..

JOURNEY TO CHINA 10: CHINESE PROBITY. The unfortunate man who commits a little failing and gives 80 per cent to his creditors is ruined, dishonoured, lost, and sees all his careers close before him... if he would like to be well thought of, well received in the world, there is only one way... that is to begin again upon a bigger scale and to give away nothing at all

JOURNEY TO CHINA 17: THE PENAL CODE. The Chinese legislators have decreed that all the accused will answer a summons freely in front of their judges, and so they are brought before the examining magistrate between two policemen and bound with handcuffs, which in fact leaves them no more liberty than to sneeze. Moreover justice is delivered with such promptness in the Celestial Empire that it is very rare for he who has been cautioned to remain more than eight months before attending his trial, finally the solemn day arrives when he sees himself sentenced to a fortnight in prison, and the capped mandarin has the goodness to explain to him that this fortnight is not to be confused with the eight months he has already spent behind bolted doors

Caricaturana 92: Sir, I despise the charlatanism of the poster, I despise the Puffs of the advertisement, I abhor everything which smells of the charalatan, the tumbler, the rope-dancer, and I limit myself to producing with all naivete and foolishness my merchandise. Read my catalogue! Scent of love, esteem and friendship, in phials from the Middle-Ages... Extract of the smile of infancy －Perfume of Adolphe's first steps－ Water of the peoples' alliance, for the handkerchief, with Beranger's song. Perfume of General Foy, a scent to strengthen the brain's fibre and to remind the French of their liberties and rights guaranteed by the constitutional charter. Surrounded by an oration given upon the tomb of the immortal deputy by one of his honourable colleagues. You see, it's impossible to be more simple

PARLIAMENTARY IDYLLS 9: Come to play in the field, /A roguish urchin said to him; / Barrot, from good humour / Does not suspect until too late! / In vain he strives, / But once you have allowed yourself to be deceived / There, as elsewhere, a lost position, / Is difficult to regain! Moral stanzas By General d'Hautpoul. (cultivating the Muses in secret.)

MISADVENTURES AND DISAPPOINTMENT OF MR.GOGO 4: But my dear Gogo, you're joking, how can you leave in your business the three thousand francs my daughter brings you, and the two hundred thousand francs for which you are indebted to her?... do you consider that? to expose the fortune of my child to the risks of commerce!... and if you don't succeed,... if you die, my daughter will then be ruined?... not so, not so, if you please! you're going to marry according to dowry regulations, to put into a good mortgage,... Devil take it! I should foresee a separation, today you're a friend, tomorrow you're not, you see it all the time

MISADVENTURES AND DISAPPOINTMENT OF MR.GOGO 4: But my dear Gogo, you're joking, how can you leave in your business the three thousand francs my daughter brings you, and the two hundred thousand francs for which you are indebted to her?... do you consider that? to expose the fortune of my child to the risks of commerce!... and if you don't succeed,... if you die, my daughter will then be ruined?... not so, not so, if you please! you're going to marry according to dowry regulations, to put into a good mortgage,... Devil take it! I should foresee a separation, today you're a friend, tomorrow you're not, you see it all the time

Ancient History 30: Dionysius the tyrant. If he chooses this condition in his sorry fortune, / It is because in the matter of schools / Tyrants always make too much of it, / So that they can fine one [school] in their old age (The late Barthelemy)

NEWS 200: A VISIT TO THE CONVICT-PRISON IN NAPLES: Mr.Gladstone－ And what do you call this man? he doesn't look like a villain. The Gaolor－ Don't you believe any of it, on the contrary,he's a demagogue, an old constitutional minister of 1848 called Carlo Poërio. In his inexhaustible clemency the best and most worthy of kings ordered that we chain him to an assassin, so that he might return to the good. He'd have been completely lost if we'd left him with another demagogue

TODAY'S PHILANTHROPISTS 9: “Yesterday, in the rue St. Honoré, a respectable old man fell, struck by an attack of apoplexy, it would have been the end of him had not the celebrated Doctor Cabassol, who was by chance at his window at No. 107, hastened to fly to his aid: thanks to intelligent and prodigious help together with the most touching solicitude the sick man was promptly restored to life. Our celebrated Doctor Cabassol topping his generous behaviour wanted to receive as payment for his care only the thanks of a family which will eternally bless his name. Honour to Doctor Cabassol!” －Look here, it's you who's the respectable old man in question, yesterday you failed to fall when coming to see me, you could have injured yourself and then I could have saved you... I contrived it all a little more dramatically for the newspaper... it won't do you any harm and it'll do me a lot of good!

TODAY'S PHILANTHROPISTS 6: －Sir, I'm giving towards the Batignolles earthquake... here are two francs... but put down my name and address in your day-book: Rigolard Philanthropic stationer, 345, rue St. Honoré, stocks clocks, plasters by Dantan, Bohemian glass, English riding-sticks, German chemical matches, and generally everything that doesn't relate to his profession!..