Parisian Emotions 50: A victim of the factions. Ah...ah...at...tchoo!! we're doing well, my nose is pouring too. Mr. Jacqueminot should have drilled some ducks to mount guard in this weather ... and what's more ah... at... tchoo!! what if they caught a cold

Parisian Emotions 15: But waiter, it is unworthy

Parisian Emotions 15: But waiter, it is unworthy

News 122: The last day for the submission of pictures: －Heavens above! －we're already here and my picture isn’t finished... I’m annoyed at having hired my porter for the whole day, I would sooner have had him carry it by the hour!..

Parisian Emotions 28: Eh, there you are my poor chap! How..

SKETCHES OF AUTUMN 1: －What... you're going to press grapes with your feet ?... －Well!...they're not at all dirty... anyway, I've taken care to take my shoes off!..

TRIVIAL THINGS 8: －Don't talk to me about it, it's pitiful:there's a man who's spent his week's money on strong drink, you should look after such unfortunates... －Well at least, pick him up!... －Certainly not... he didn't get drunk at my place!

Ancient History 30: Dionysius the tyrant. If he chooses this condition in his sorry fortune, / It is because in the matter of schools / Tyrants always make too much of it, / So that they can fine one [school] in their old age (The late Barthelemy)

Parisian Emotions 1: Aren't they dreary!... see how they make off!... what it is not to live in property!!!... My little loves, when you come by again we should warn you, we'll burn pastilles from the Seraglio for you..

BOHEMIANS OF PARIS 8: THE GRAMMAR SCHOOL FRIEND: Ah! dear friend; how stout you've become... let me embrace you! let me embrace you! (the instant after, it was nothing but a mistake and the gentleman discovers that his extempore friend wished to make the acquaintance of... his watch!)

NEWS 37: A STUBBORN OLD MAN. －Clerk of the court, would you be kind enough to tell me when they'll punish the individual who, at the place du Havre, put my eye in the condition in which you see it. －But sir, it's unthinkable that you should continue to wear such an eye-patch when we've proven to you that no one was punched in the place du Havre... do you know that the ex-members of the Society of the Tenth of December would have the right to demand compensation for the harm that you're doing to their reputation!

BOHEMIANS OF PARIS 27: COUNTRY ACTORS: －Yes,my dear fellow,yes the barbarians hissed at me in Cinna;and what's more you've seen me in Cinna! －Yes, I flatter myself that I've seen you, but don't you see that the provincials are hard up; open at the Français, go and find Mr.J.J.,get yourself looked after, ask for one hundred thousand francs per year and they'll applaud you...but you want success with 1500F[rancs] salaries and at Beauvais...greenhorn!

NEWS 45: ABDUCTION OF A GIRL-SPIRIT OF THE AIR. － Come, come, Mr. Godard, I'm frozen, let me into the gondola... － That's impossible, since we'll be seen by Paris... － But I've got a frightful head-cold!... － All I can promise is to wipe your nose, as soon as we get into a cloud!..

TENANTS AND LANDLORDS 22: Is the account exact?... now you're going to ask me if I can give you a receipt... under the pretext that if one's rich one should always give something!..

Caricatures of the Day: The bourgeois at the Salon: Let's see... What's that?... (reading from his catalogue) "No. 387. Portrait of Mr. B*** stock-broker"... well... well!... oh! how stupid I am... 386 is the portrait of Mr. B***, this is a portrait of a bull by Mr. Bracassat... I'd also say... that the idea of having yourself painted with horns as big as that... after that, you can't refuse a stock-broker anything

NAUTICAL IMPRESSIONS. NAUTICAL THRILLS: Mr. PRUDHOMME. －What..., impudent waves!... do you indeed not know whom you are carrying at this moment, since you are so bold towards me?... understand that, like Xerxes, I am able to have you lashed!... Mrs. PRUDHOMME (Trembling all over) －Oh!... my dear... I beg you!... don't be impertinent to it, you'll put it in a rage and it's capable of swallowing us up!..

Bathers 26: －Look out, Gargouillet, there's the master going by with his wife; we should wash our hair and hang the soap. －Thank you, I've just finished with it

TODAY'S PHILANTHROPISTS 12: －So then, my friend, at the age of twenty two you had already killed three men... what a powerful nature, and how guilty society is for not having better guided it!... －Oh! yeah sir!... in my view the police have been very wrong... without them I wouldn't be here!..

TRIVIAL THINGS 7: －Come to dinner, my wife dines in town: we will be fellows together. －Ah,deuce,I have a migraine! (aside) and his wife who is waiting for me at home!

JOURNEY TO CHINA 9: A CHINESE DANCE.One is greatly mistaken if one believes the Chinese people to be giddy, joyful and the friend of pleasure: they are on the contrary serious and morose, since their greatest amusement consists in a type of lugubrious walking in which the men and women walk one in front of the other, or one beside the other, and seem to be saying among themselves: brother we should die! In order also to point to the philosophical intention behind this ceremony, the opposite of dancing, they call it: Counter-dancing

You look like getting chased by a fire. How pale you are...you aren't yourself. What's the matter? "It's not good to chase after what you think to be precious," I answerd muttering

Ancient History 18: Today's witticism. What is Diogenes doing with a lantern? / Said the elegantly turnd-out Dandies to themselves. / Sirs, I am looking for a man, and with my slow, dim eye. / I can't see him; said he: those words really annoyed them (Attempt at poetry by Mr. de Rambuteau)

THE SPECULATORS 1: －I bought this ground at one franc per metre and I'll sell it at 9 francs. －Who to?... －The name's not important as long as I earn 8 francs per metre... it's not too expensive. the ground's well worth 600 francs per metre on the boulevard Montmartre!... －Yes, but this place isn't populated. －What d'you mean, not populated... there are more than twenty thousand rabbits!

Celebrrrrrrated Painting Jury: composed of a Composer, an Astronomer, a Mathematician, several Architects and a Chemist. － The Chemist (yawning)... in... the... fi... nal... an...alysis..., and because on the painting Jury there is no Painter! What if we went to dinner

THE ALARMISTS AND ALARMED. 1: －Oh my god! they 've set fire to the neighbour's house!... don't look, Théodore, it'll hurt you too much!... －Why no... it's he who 's just lit up his window with three Chinese lanterns!..